Thursday Thirteen #5

Thirteen Things about My Daughter, Elizabeth

1…. She is my first-born child, born January 30, 1981.

2.... She is a strong, independent woman.

3.... She is a strong, faithful Christian woman - seeking God's truths and striving to be the best she can be for Him!

4.... She is a loving wife and mother.

5.... She is an amazing daughter - not only my daughter, but one of my best friends. She and I shared many experiences together!

6.... She saved my life! When I became pregnant, it gave me the courage to leave the abusive marriage I had been in for four years - knowing I did not want to bring a child into such a terrifying life!

7.... She gave me hope and helped me continue living while in the midst of rebuilding my life as a single parent - giving me focus and showing me what really mattered in my life!

8.... She still gives me strength and encouragement when I fail to see the positive elements in my life.

9.... She is kind and caring - loving her brother and sisters unconditionally.

10... She loves my Mom and sits with her when I need help - or just helps with her when she comes to visit!

11... She knows me better than most people know me - I was a single Mom for eight (8) years after her birth. She and I shared so many things together and we know each other almost as well as we know ourselves!

12... She and her husband, Michael plan to give me more grandchildren! My brother, Gerry and I have had a running competition going since we are the only siblings with grandchildren. Gerry is ahead of me right now with 7 to my 4!

13... She gave me my first experience as a mother - an experience I wouldn't change for the world! She was my everything, alone, for those first eight years. She taught me to put myself last - because she mattered more than I mattered!




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Listening for God's Voice

When I am busy, stressed out,

in pain, or in temptation,

I shall stop for just a moment,

open the door of my heart,

and listen for God's voice within me.

Things around here have been fairly quiet the past few days. Mother had a pretty bad attack last week and I had to call Hospice on Saturday evening for support. Our nurse Christy (whom we love!) was not on call, but I was able to talk to Jenny, who has also been a big help to us over these past months – especially getting Mom signed up with Hospice in the beginning. Some medication changes have been made and they seem to be helping! She has been calm the past three days and has not had any real agitation.

Saturday with the family was great! I didn’t win the pie contest – but neither did Charlie! Kaitlin won with a banana cream icebox pie. I guess it was good because the judges were certainly raving about it! Charlie, Susan and Summer were a little later arriving and the judges had already made their decision. They did taste-test Charlie’s pie but still concluded that Kaitlin was the true winner!

Aunt Nelda came out Monday and visited with Mom for a little while. They exchanged gifts – Aunt Nelda gave Mom a framed copy of a beautiful poem she had written and we gave Aunt Nelda prints of three different paintings Mom had done before she lost her sight. Aunt Nelda also gave Mom a gown and a pair of house shoes, which are a great addition to her “meager collection” of winter attire! Gerry and Pam gave her money, which we will use to get more winter gowns and robes. Jody and I also gave her a gown and two pair of house shoes. Kathy and Randy gave her two robes, which are really pretty. I had ordered three gowns and a robe, from both Bob and Jeannie and Jody and me, but have not yet received them – so much for mail order! Hopefully, they will come in this week.

Jody and Michael picked up the lift and the chair from Jane on Saturday and the chair has already proved to be a great blessing. It is a lift-chair, which raises her from a sitting position to almost standing which alleviates having to lift her from a sitting position. I am so thankful that Jane thought of us when looking for someone who could use both the chair and the lift. I’m sure the lift will be of great benefit when the time comes as well.

At this point, she is still able to support herself enough to move around the little bit that she does during the day. I don’t think it will be long before she is unable to support herself at all. She sleeps so much of the time now and has quite a bit of pain in her back. She has just recently started complaining of some chest pain, but her vital signs are still good.

When Jane called me last week about the chair and the lift, we talked about what a great blessing we feel it is to be able to care for our mothers. She was able to care for her Mother, too and just recently lost her. I know that this time I spend caring for my Mom will be a part of my life that I will never regret! I am truly blessed that God provided the way for Jody and me to have her in our home for the remainder of her life. Even though it is difficult at times and hard for me knowing that she doesn’t recognize me so much of the time, I wouldn’t want it any other way!

She and my Dad were always there for me and for my siblings. There was never a time in my life when I felt that I couldn’t go to them for help when I needed it – and knew that they would help! I love them for the life they gave me and for the many life-lessons I learned along the way.

My daughter is trying to figure out what direction is the right one for her to take both for herself and for her children. It’s so difficult to see her in the middle of such turmoil and having to decide things she never thought she would be confronted with in regard to her marriage. I pray for her daily that she will be guided by the Lord and make decisions based upon His guidance.

We are all still adjusting to the new living arrangements – it’s new for all of us. It’s going well, I think. Since I have only one son, having two young boys in the house has been a big adjustment for me. They are busy all the time – in a hurry and noise loving! They are adjusting well and learning about “inside voices” and walking in the house – saving the running and rowdiness for outside. They’ve been able to play outside the past few days, which has helped them a lot! They love being outside and it has been hard for them to be stuck inside. I love having them here and it was a lot of fun watching them Christmas morning! Children are so ready to be filled with every experience around them! The least little thing, to them, is so new and amazing! It’s a shame that some of us lose that exuberance as we get older.

Monday was a quiet day for all of us. Jody and I worked around the kitchen – he made shelves and put them up where I had decided they were needed most for additional storage space. We had planned to remodel the kitchen – putting in new cabinets – before I stopped working. Since that is on hold for a while, we are just trying to work things out so that I am able to have more storage space without putting in a lot of money. We had a microwave/range hood that we bought a while back in preparation for the new cabinets and had not been able to use all this time. We were able to figure out a way to get it into the kitchen now so that we can use it rather than just store it! I am really glad to have it up – it’s something I had been looking forward to for a long time.

I am now looking toward the year ahead and changes I can implement into my life to mold myself more into the woman God would have me be in His perfect plan. I am so richly blessed and know that without Him I am nothing! I strive daily to be better than I was the day before and am going to work on areas that I know can be more pleasing to Him.

“Do not despise…small beginnings,

for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin.”

Zechariah 4:10

Thursday Thirteen #4

Thirteen Things about My Daughter, Candace

1…. Candace is our youngest daughter, 23 years old!

2.... She is a wife - for four years.

3.... She is a mother of two boys, ages 4 and 2.

4.... She is very loving and giving!

5.... She is a great help to me with my Mom - sitting with her if I need to run to the store and picking up my son at school each afternoon since I can't leave my Mom alone.

6.... She is a very good housekeeper!

7.... She has beautiful eyes - long, thick lashes and perfectly arched brows! How many of us would give for those?!

8.... She is a good Mom - loves her boys and enjoys being with them.

9.... She is a good sister to her siblings - very loyal and loving.

10... She has a kind heart - never wants anyone to be mad at her!

11... She loves spending time with family - it doesn't matter what we're doing, she just likes being together!

12... She is always open and willing to do anything for anyone - without complaining!

13... She became my "instant" child when she was only 6! I can't imagine my life without her in it!

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1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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God is Good and God is Constant!

My last entry was melancholy, bleak and empty. I was feeling completely overwhelmed and overloaded. I talked about the problem I have, when in the midst of trials and tribulation, of letting go and laying my burden at the feet of our Savior. God is good and God is constant and prayers have been answered at the request of His petitioners! I can feel that the burden I was struggling with has been lifted from my shoulders and am reminded, once again, that God is in control and gives peace to those who come to Him in prayer and supplication.

My son-in-law is taking some positive steps, on his own, to get the help he needs to allow God to work in him and make him whole! He has called me many times over the last few days and asked that I set up appointments for him and get everything lined out for him to meet with a counselor – and he would then attend the meetings I scheduled for him. I told him consistently that he has to take the steps needed for himself – find a counselor, preacher or someone else he can talk to and can work with him to get the help he needs. Yesterday I received a call from a minister who said my son-in-law had come to him asking for help. I feel like he is definitely taking some steps in the right direction.

We had family pictures (minus Toni’s family because of illness in the family) taken last week, so I’ve included them here. I’m very proud of my family and love every opportunity to show them off to anyone who is kind enough to feign interest.
























Sunday evening, we attended a choir recital for Addyson. This was her first recital and she was a little nervous, but she did a great job! She was so cute and I love watching young children performing. The expressions on their faces – either of excitement or fear – is precious! I am also including some pictures from the recital.

















Mother is still having problems with extreme agitation. She woke up this morning calling for her Mom, trying to climb out of bed and crying. She told me she thought she would probably be arrested today because she broke into the telephone company. I told her she had not ever done anything like that, but she insisted that she had and would not go back to sleep until I checked outside to make sure there were no “motorcycles” here. I gave her morning medication, got her cleaned up and she was able to go back to sleep. I worry some because she is becoming weaker and unable to support herself so much of the time now. I have almost dropped her a couple of times and have wondered how I will be able to lift her when she becomes totally unable to support herself.

Candace just talked to her Gramma about something and while on the phone with her was told about another woman at church who has lost her mother and now has a lift that I might be able to use with my Mom. Another prayer answered!!

I’m so ready for Christmas! Saturday, my family – brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews – meet for our get-together! We don’t exchange gifts anymore – we stopped that a long time ago! It’s so great for all of us to be together! Since we are all grown and have grown children, it’s hard to get everyone together in once place very often. I’m excited to be with them and hopefully to win the “pie contest”. I know Charlie has hopes that he will win, but I will certainly have my best entry there for judging!

Saturday evening Jody and I, with all our children and grandchildren (I hope and pray everyone will be able to be there) will meet together at Michael and Elizabeth's house for our Christmas together! I love to see the excitment of the kids as they open each of their gifts! It's going to be a great day and I can hardly wait!

In Everything Give Thanks

A four-year-old boy was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited ... and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"



Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:4

My "Goliath"

AT last to be identified!
At last, the lamps upon thy side,
The rest of life to see!
Past midnight, past the morning star!
Past sunrise! Ah! what leagues there are
Between our feet and day!

-Emily Dickinson-

It would start with just a look - an expression I had come to know meant anger! A rage that comes out of nowhere! A rage that I knew meant pain and terror - terror like no other! I feared - each time - that this would be the last time. The last time that I would feel anything . . . anything at all. I feared, and sometimes hoped, that this time would end my life!

I survived! I survived years of abuse at the hands of my husband. Not only did I survive one marriage to an abusive husband, but I survived two marriages - both filled with abuse and the terror that comes with the beatings, the belief that if I had been a better wife - if I had fixed the right meal; if I had folded the laundry correctly; if I had not missed that speck of dirt on the floor; if I had not fixed my hair or make-up the wrong way or any other "violation" I had committed against him, I would not have been "punished".

Even today, it's difficult for me to admit - or understand - why I married, twice, men who hurt me in ways that I had never experienced before and have never experienced since - since those horrible years! When my first marriage "ended", he stalked me for several years. I never saw him - he was very good at staying undetected, but he would call me regularly to inform me that he had been watching, and to give me details of the things I had been doing, where I had gone, anyone who had come to my house - he was still controlling me!

When my second marriage ended, I was stalked again! I was followed, had damage done to my house and to my car, I was threatened with death! In both instances, I had to file restraining orders and had the police tap my phone to record the death threats to be used as evidence - "in case". I experienced, not only regular beatings, but loaded guns pointed at my head and still to this day, I don't know why I survived!

I have been married, now, for almost 18 years to a man who has never laid a hand on me in anger! I believe that God brought Jody into my life - and into my daughter's life - and I have learned that I am worthy of a man who can love me in the way God intended a wife to be loved! My Dad loved my Mom and never abused her. I did not live in a household where I would have learned that spousal abuse was okay. I never saw my Mom and Dad fight! I don't know why I married abusers - and guess I never will know why.

I had pushed all those memories far away from my conscious mind - or so I thought! Those years of my life seemed like another lifetime! Even the life of someone else - not my own! I guess it's never as far away as I wanted to believe! There have been some events within the past week that have brought it all back - as though it had never ended!

I need the faith and the strength of David against my "Goliath of memories"! I have again experienced the terror I felt so many years ago - but for a family member! We have had to have law enforcement involved and have lived several days now, looking over our shoulders; keeping post at the windows; locking all the doors and "hiding". Each time we think we've reached a calmness, it rises up again!

I'm trying, desperately, to give it to God! I'm trying to be calm, not be fearful, go through each day as I normally would - but I'm having trouble letting go! I know that nothing on this earth is under my control, but knowing that and "living" it are sometimes difficult for me! I pray that God will strengthen me and give me the peace that can come only from laying it all at his feet and letting go!

I love my family and know that I can count on them for help in any circumstance. I have called upon them now to help and most of them are very supportive and willing to do anything we need help with to get through all of this! I can't imagine my life without my family - but more importantly, I can't imagine my life without Almighty God!

Please pray for my daughter and her family - for their safety and for guidance in making decisions that have to be made at this time. Please pray for my son-in-law that he seeks and finds the help he needs to be healthy and whole for himself, for his wife and for his children!

Do not be anxious about anything,

but in everything, by prayer and petition,

with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

And the peace of God,

which transcends all understanding,

will guard your hearts and your minds.

--Philippians 4:6-7

I am including a link - http://www.nostatusquo.com/ACLU/dworkin/WarZoneChaptIIIB.html

- with this post because I believe it truly depicts the life of a battered woman. Many people have misconceptions about the reasons abuse occurs in a marriage and why a woman "stays" in the marriage.

1 Samuel 17

David and Goliath
1 Now the Philistines gathered their forces for war and assembled at Socoh in Judah. They pitched camp at Ephes Dammim, between Socoh and Azekah.

2 Saul and the Israelites assembled and camped in the Valley of Elah and drew up their battle line to meet the Philistines.

3 The Philistines occupied one hill and the Israelites another, with the valley between them.

4 A champion named Goliath, who was from Gath, came out of the Philistine camp. He was over nine feet [a] tall.

5 He had a bronze helmet on his head and wore a coat of scale armor of bronze weighing five thousand shekels [b] ;

6 on his legs he wore bronze greaves, and a bronze javelin was slung on his back.

7 His spear shaft was like a weaver's rod, and its iron point weighed six hundred shekels. [c] His shield bearer went ahead of him.

8 Goliath stood and shouted to the ranks of Israel, "Why do you come out and line up for battle? Am I not a Philistine, and are you not the servants of Saul? Choose a man and have him come down to me.

9 If he is able to fight and kill me, we will become your subjects; but if I overcome him and kill him, you will become our subjects and serve us."

10 Then the Philistine said, "This day I defy the ranks of Israel! Give me a man and let us fight each other."

11 On hearing the Philistine's words, Saul and all the Israelites were dismayed and terrified.

16 For forty days the Philistine came forward every morning and evening and took his stand. 17 Now Jesse said to his son David, "Take this ephah [d] of roasted grain and these ten loaves of bread for your brothers and hurry to their camp.

18 Take along these ten cheeses to the commander of their unit. [e] See how your brothers are and bring back some assurance [f] from them.

19 They are with Saul and all the men of Israel in the Valley of Elah, fighting against the Philistines."

20 Early in the morning David left the flock with a shepherd, loaded up and set out, as Jesse had directed. He reached the camp as the army was going out to its battle positions, shouting the war cry.

22 David left his things with the keeper of supplies, ran to the battle lines and greeted his brothers.

23 As he was talking with them, Goliath, the Philistine champion from Gath, stepped out from his lines and shouted his usual defiance, and David heard it.

24 When the Israelites saw the man, they all ran from him in great fear.

33 Saul replied, "You are not able to go out against this Philistine and fight him; you are only a boy, and he has been a fighting man from his youth."

34 But David said to Saul, "Your servant has been keeping his father's sheep. When a lion or a bear came and carried off a sheep from the flock,

35 I went after it, struck it and rescued the sheep from its mouth. When it turned on me, I seized it by its hair, struck it and killed it.

36 Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God.

37 The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine." Saul said to David, "Go, and the LORD be with you."

40 Then he took his staff in his hand, chose five smooth stones from the stream, put them in the pouch of his shepherd's bag and, with his sling in his hand, approached the Philistine.

41 Meanwhile, the Philistine, with his shield bearer in front of him, kept coming closer to David.

42 He looked David over and saw that he was only a boy, ruddy and handsome, and he despised him.

43 He said to David, "Am I a dog, that you come at me with sticks?" And the Philistine cursed David by his gods.

44 "Come here," he said, "and I'll give your flesh to the birds of the air and the beasts of the field!"

45 David said to the Philistine, "You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.

46 This day the LORD will hand you over to me, and I'll strike you down and cut off your head. Today I will give the carcasses of the Philistine army to the birds of the air and the beasts of the earth, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel.

47 All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD's, and he will give all of you into our hands."

48 As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him.

49 Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.

50 So David triumphed over the Philistine with a sling and a stone; without a sword in his hand he struck down the Philistine and killed him.

51 David ran and stood over him. He took hold of the Philistine's sword and drew it from the scabbard. After he killed him, he cut off his head with the sword. When the Philistines saw that their hero was dead, they turned and ran.

Thursday Thirteen #3

Thirteen Things about My Son, Chance

1…. He is my baby - When Jody and I married, Jody had two daughters from a previous marriage and I had one daughter from another marriage. Chance is our child together.

2....He was our last chance for a boy - which is how we came up with his name! We knew we wanted a child - one child - together and since we already had three girls, this would be the only opportunity for us to have a son!

3....He is 16 - will be 17 next month!


4....He is a great kid! He has strong values and doesn't give in to peer pressure to smoke, drink or get involved with drugs!

5....He is very loving and kind! He doesn't mind getting and giving hugs and affection (as long as we're at home!)

6....He is very artistic!

7....He is so intelligent! He was tested and placed in a gifted program during grade school.

8....He talks to me - if we have a problem that needs to be addressed, he is able to talk to me and share his opinions on any subject and usually, after some negotiation, we are able to come to a resolution.

9....He is his own person - sometimes to his own detriment. He tends to overthink things, such as school work, and decides whether or not it is worth his time to complete it. This has probably been our biggest problem, but I have had several of his teachers tell me that it's not unusual for many of their gifted students to have this problem! This is one issue I definitely would not have missed!

10...He is respectful! I am proud of the way he treats others!

11...He is very much like his Dad! He looks a lot like him and many of his mannerisms are the same! Most of the time, that's a good thing!

12...He's good with my Mom! Even as frustrating as it can be to care for her, he never is disrespectful to her. (Sometimes, he would like to tease her, though, because of the, seemingly, exciting life she lives now - the many trips she takes, the hallucinations she has, etc.)

13...He completed our family! It was great having three daughters, but I'm glad I have been able to experience being a mother to my son! It's been a different experience - and it's been wonderful!

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

(leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

http://www.chelleyoung.com

http://fourbzboysmom.blogspot.com

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Be Still And Know

Be Still And Know

In the midst of our adversities,

When all hope seems to be no more,

There's a Saviour whom we can turn to,

Who stands at our hearts' door,

Saying, "Be still and know I am God."

When our questions go unanswered,

And our prayers appear to fall on deaf ears,

Be assured that the Lord, He is listening!

The message He has is quite clear,

"Be still, and know I am God."

Wait upon His precious plans and promises,

Be not quick to outrun His will,

For His ways and thoughts are not ours,

In HIS timing ALL things will be fulfilled,

If we'd just "Be still and know HE IS GOD."

- Linda Lee Wolovich –

This has been a tragic day for a dear friend to my Mom and to my family. He found family members dead this morning at his home. He’s a very dear man and it’s such a tragedy and made even more so that he had to find them. Our thoughts and prayers are with him and his family today and while they go through these difficult times.

Mom had a tough time this evening. She had done well all day, but around 4:00 this afternoon she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said she just felt like she is all alone. She didn’t recognize me – thought I was her Aunt Flora. It’s very hard to convince her that she is with me, her child, when she doesn’t even recognize who I am.

Mother asked me to call her sister, Nelda, this evening so she could talk to her. She was pretty distressed on the phone and Aunt Nelda told her she would come out in the morning to visit with her for a little while. I feel bad when I call anyone for Mother and then she’s so upset on the phone with them. It seems like Aunt Nelda and Jeannie get the worst of it. Sometimes when I call I don’t even know that Mom’s upset until she starts talking on the phone!

We had family pictures taken on Sunday. Unfortunately, Toni and her family were not able to be there because Blake was sick. She had planned to come and had just told me on Thursday that she and Blake would be in the picture with us. I was really disappointed that they weren’t able to be there. We had scheduled the appointment over a month in advance and could not reschedule before Christmas. It takes such planning when I go anywhere because I have to get someone to come in and sit with Mom while I’m gone. I depend on Jeannie to relieve me during those times because I’ve really not had anyone else volunteer to sit with her. Aunt Nelda has told me several times that she will sit with Mother if I need someone, but I’m afraid that she might not be able to handle all of the duties involved. I feel better with Jeannie there anyway, because I think Mother is more comfortable with Jeannie or me. The first few times Jeannie sat with her, Mother would not let Jeannie help her to the bathroom or to bed. She only wanted me to help her. Thankfully she now allows Jeannie to help her, too. It makes it much easier for me because when she wouldn’t let Jeannie help, I would have to come home after being out and still do everything myself! Things are much better this way.

I have most of my Christmas shopping done although I still need to wrap everything. I don’t like wrapping packages and put it off as long as possible. This year I have been handling all of the gifts for Mom to give and that is taking a little bit of time. I have almost finished with her gifts, though.

Elizabeth had planned to host our family – Jody, me and our kids and grandkids – Christmas get together on Dec 23, but Nick and Candace have some scheduling conflicts, so we will probably reschedule. Elizabeth hasn’t yet decided on an alternate date, but I’m sure she will soon.

This next weekend is Jody’s Christmas party given by his employer. We go every year and I’m really looking forward to it this year because Nick and Candace will be there, too. Nick went to work there a few months ago, so we’ll be able to get together with them for the evening. Kathy also works at the same place – in the office – and she and Randy are planning to attend also. During past years, the party was always held on Sunday evening, so Kathy and Randy never attended. This year it will be on Saturday evening, so we’ll all be there! Saturday is also Jody’s birthday, so we’re staying at the hotel for the night. Michael and Elizabeth are coming out to spend the night and watch over Mom so that we can enjoy the night out. I’m looking forward to the break. I love my Mom dearly, but have to admit that it will be nice not to have to worry about her for that period of time!

I love the Christmas season because it’s family time! There’s nothing better than getting together with family and enjoying each other! As we – my siblings and myself – get older and our children get older, it seems much more difficult to get us all together at the same time. I’m thankful that we are able to get together whenever we can and am looking forward to seeing them all next week!

I appeal to you, brothers,

in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,

that all of you agree with one another

so that there may be no divisions among you

and that you may be perfectly united

in mind and thought.

1 Corinthians 1:10

"My Soul Clings to You"

Another week ending and I have to say I am glad to see this one end. Mother had a great day most of the day yesterday, but the evening was something else altogether!

She woke up about 5:00am yesterday and I got her up to the bathroom and then back to bed. I checked on her several times during the morning because she was sleeping so late. Connie came around 11:45 am and we got Mom up then – she was still sleeping!

After Mother had her shower, I got her lunch and then she just sat and watched Ethan sleep. I kept Ethan yesterday for Sheila because the regular sitter had a doctor’s appointment. He fell asleep about 11:30 in the kitchen floor while he was playing. He had been playing with his Thomas the Tank Engine trains and got quiet, so I looked to see what he was doing and he was sound asleep! I picked him up and put him on the couch where he slept until about 3:00.

Candace and the boys brought Chance home from school around 3:15. Ethan was thrilled to see the boys. They had a great time playing together. One thing about three little boys together – at least these three – is that they are very loud! We finally sent them to the laundry room to play so that we could talk to each other.

Michael stopped by on his way home from Agra, where he had been working yesterday, around the same time Candace got here. Then Donell, Mom’s Hospice social worker, came in to visit with Mom. After Donell left, Christy, Mom’s Hospice nurse came for her weekly visit and check-up on Mom.

Needless to say, Mother missed her nap due to all the activity during the day. It's unusual to have so much activity, in one day, at our house. I think she probably just got overly tired and overly stimulated which caused her to become anxious later that evening!

Bob and Jeannie came over around 6:30, along with Elizabeth, Michael and Addy so that we could play cards. Candace had also left Levi at our house because Elizabeth and Michael were taking him home with them when they left last night.

Mother started feeling anxious, talking about going home shortly after Bob and Jeannie arrived. I tried to go along with what she was saying, telling her that she would be staying the night here with me; telling her that we had let her family know that she was here (otherwise she worries that they don’t know where she is); telling her that Daddy was up at the house and had supper there – claiming that I had talked to him and he didn’t want her to get out tonight because it was so cold! Usually, she calms down if I go along with what she is saying rather than telling her the truth - that her Mom and Dad and husband have passed away.

Last night, none of this satisfied her. She told me she was not staying here – she was going home. She became so insistent that I had to tell her that they had all passed away many years ago. I explained that she now lives with Jody and me and is here because we want her and want to be able to care for her. She was heart-broken when I told her that they were all gone! She gets upset because she doesn’t remember their deaths. She has lost so many memories! Jeannie and I both cried with her – it is so hard to see her that way! I had given her all her meds, but by the time she took them she was pretty well on her way to a bad time and it takes a while for the meds to take effect!

Jeannie and I put her to bed, prayed with her and then I sat and talked with her for a little bit until she felt she could go to sleep. She went to sleep before too long – the medicine helps with that!

She also started to ask about Daddy when she first woke this morning, but then remembered, from being told last night, that he passed away! That’s really unusual for her, these days, to remember anything for any length of time. As I put up the bedrail, after getting her back to bed she asked me, “Will I be like this the rest of my life?” I told her that yes, she probably would. She then stated, “At least like this.” She seemed to realize that from now on, things would continue to decline. She started to cry a little bit then. She didn’t want anything to eat or drink – only to sleep. She has been sleeping since then.

When she woke this morning, she thought it was Sunday and wanted to know if we would be going to church. Not being able to attend worship services is another very difficult thing for her to handle. She has always been diligent about attending services every time the doors opened. She taught Sunday school classes for as long as I can remember. She just is not able to get out and go anywhere any longer. First of all, it’s very difficult for her to get around at all. She uses the walker but, because of her unsteadiness, she has a high risk of falling. Even with her using the walker, I am right beside her to assist. She only walks to the bathroom and back or to the bedroom and back. Nothing else.

Bob and Jeannie bring communion each Sunday afternoon for us and we sing and pray together. I read the Bible to Mom often – she has always made time for study and is no longer able to see well enough to read on her own.

Mother has been so worried about Christmas presents this year – wondering what she was going to do about the presents she wanted to give because she doesn’t have money to do anything. I have been working on gifts for her to give and assure that she will have a gift for everyone. She has always given each of her kids and each of her grandkids something for Christmas every year.

My Mom and Dad have a big family – six children; six children’s spouses; 17 grandchildren (1 deceased); 8 grandchildren’s spouses; 11 great grandchildren. The last few years, because she hasn’t had the money to buy things, she has been giving away her own things. They have meant a lot to her and I hope they mean a lot to the recipients. I don’t think the younger kids really understand the meaning behind getting Grandma’s “used” treasures, but hopefully they will later.

Bob and Jeannie have the responsibility of planning Christmas this year. We decided a few years ago, that we would each take a year and on our year we have the responsibility of deciding the date, the place, the menu and planning any special activities for the day. The person responsible can do pretty much anything they want to do on their particular year. It’s been a lot of fun. Last year instead of the traditional Christmas menu, we had Mexican food. We also had a guacamole contest which Charlie won for the best tasting guac! He claims he will be winning the prize again this year for the best pie. Jeannie has planned a pie contest for this year. I’m not so sure he is going to win – I have, what I think, is a prize winning entry! Don’t count on that prize yet, Charlie!

Mother will go with us when we meet for Christmas. I can’t imagine her not being there. Since I will have help to get her there, I know it will be okay. I’m sure once we’re there, I won’t have the sole responsibility of caring for her which will help me enjoy the day, too. We are meeting on the 23rd which is coming up soon!

On that same evening, Jody and I will be having Christmas with our children and grandchildren, so it’s going to be a busy day for us! Michael and Elizabeth have decided they want to host this year at their house in Norman. I’m looking forward to all of us being together! It’s hard to get everyone together at the same time anymore. Jeannie is going to sit with Mother that evening while we go to Elizabeth’s.

As I go about my day, Mom is never far from my thoughts. I pray that God will provide her the comfort she needs to get through the difficult days. It has been a while since she has had such an emotional day as she did yesterday! I know that He continues to give me strength and the ability to care for her with love, kindness and compassion. I am thankful for all that He gives us.

I recently found a blogsite of a woman who expresses such faith and devotion to God that after reading it I felt blessed by her words. She included Psalm 63 in one of her entries and I am also including it in mine.

I love the Psalms and the following passage is beautiful.


Psalm 63
1. O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you,
in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
2. I have seen you in the sanctuary
and beheld your power and your glory.
3. Because your love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
4. I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands.
5. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
6. On my bed I remember you;
I think of you through the watches of the night.
7. Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
8. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.

Thursday Thirteen #3

Thirteen Things I Love About My Husband 1…. He loves me for who I am 2....He is a very hard worker - in almost 18 years of marriage, he has probably missed less than 15 days of work due to illness! 3....He is a good carpenter - he's more than a handyman! 4....He's a big guy - 6'2"; next to him I feel small and dainty! 5....He's not afraid to show affection 6....He knows how to work the washer and dryer! 7....He always remembers my birthday and our anniversary 8....He's very supportive of me in caring for my Mom and never complaining about her living with us 9....He doesn't drink! - which means a lot to me! 10...He rarely gets angry! 11...When he does get angry, he's never out of control! 12...He never meets a stranger! He can talk to anyone as if he's known them for years! 13...When I wake him up in the middle of the night and ask him to turn over because he's snoring, he turns over without getting mad! Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!) http://.justtug.blogspot.com http://skittles0366.blogspot.com http://crossandquill.com/journey http://delightfulduchess.blogspot.com/ http://fourbzboysmom.blogspot.com

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

I Miss My Mother

Today has been a day with extremes from one to the other. Mom got up this morning and as I brought her into the living room, she saw China. She asked me if China had any reaction to that medicine that she had given her.
I should have known just to say no, and forget it, but instead, I asked what medicine? That began the whole saga of Mother’s trip to South America and how China was unable to go with her because of the nodules she had on her back. Mother said that was the only reason China was here at my house because she had to have a place to leave her until she returned to the states!
She kept up her story about her trip to South America until around noon when she had lunch and then I put her back to bed for a nap. When I took her to the bathroom before putting her to bed, I was taking off her sweater and she said she didn’t need the sweater anyway, because ever since her trip to South America, she stays pretty warm most of the time now.
She only slept about two hours, which is unusual. She normally, in the afternoon, sleeps from four to six hours at a time. I think she was awakened by Jody and his brother Mike, as they were trying to free Jody’s truck from the mud.
Jody got up this morning and went out to warm up his truck. The snow was covering the timbers we have marking the driveway and he got hung up on one of them. Then when he tried to back up the truck to get it off of the timber, he slid down the hill a little bit and couldn’t get back up because of the ice. As the ice and snow melted, of course, the spot he was in turned from ice to mud and he was definitely stuck! The more he tried to move the truck, the deeper the hole became. Anyway, I think that’s why Mother woke up so early from her nap.
I have found that if she sleeps for a while in the afternoon, he anxiety is less and she is much more calm during her waking hours. Since she didn’t get her nap out, she had an anxiety attack this afternoon that went on for about an hour and a half. She was worried about her Daddy because someone told her that he was sick. I tried to reassure her by telling her that if he were sick, we would have been told. She worried about her clothes being here in the closet because they needed to be taken to her house. She worried that she owed money to Jody and at one point as Jody came through the house; she asked him how much money she owed him.
Since he came in unaware of the situation – those of you who know Jody know how he likes to tease – he decided to play with her a little and started to give her an astronomical figure to tell her how much she owed. I stopped him because I knew if he told her any amount of money that she would, of course, believe him! Then, she cried more anyway, because I had stopped him from saying an amount and she thought I was just trying to tell him not to let her know the amount. Wow! Some days, it just doesn’t pay to get up!
Before the anxiety attack ended (and I had given her all the meds I could) she cried because she wanted me to meet her Mom and Daddy and was sorry that I never had met them. I told her that I did know her Mother very well, and that she was a wonderful person. I actually stayed with my Grandma for a period of time while I was pregnant with Elizabeth.
“Dr. Phil” and then “Oprah” had been on tv, but by this time the news was on and we were watching the weather. She kept saying things about wanting me to meet her family and crying because I hadn’t and I asked her if she knew who I was. She said, “of course I do” and when I asked her my name she said I was Oprah! I tried to tell her that I was her daughter Ann, but that doesn’t work anymore. She always wants to know who told me that I was her daughter and today she actually asked me how I thought I had done that! (become her daughter).
She not only lives in her own little world – taking many trips, both stateside and around the world (in her head, of course) – but she also is having hallucinations and paranoia is something that we deal with almost on a daily basis.
I find myself questioning why she has to go through the end of her life in such a horrible manner. I know that she’s not the first, nor will she be the last person to suffer from dementia, but it is just so difficult to see her this way.
I’ve said it before, but I miss my Mom so much! Could her death be worse? I really don’t see how it could be any worse than this life is for her. She doesn’t live in reality anymore – she’s lost in some other world that I can’t reach. I spend my days pretending, pretending about every aspect of her world. I no longer tell her that all of these family members, that she believes are just down the road, have all passed away – years ago! I don’t tell her that she didn’t really go to South America or Hawaii or any of the other places she thinks she has visited. Most days, I don’t even tell her that I’m her daughter!
None of those things matter anymore! What matters is that she is able to make it through each day with as little anxiety, with as few hallucinations, with as little paranoia as possible and as much comfort as can be provided to her.
Mother was always such a believer in God and had such strong faith and submissive spirit. God was present and evident in her daily walk! She doesn’t concentrate on those things anymore. They seem to have left the world she lives in and she doesn’t experience the thankfulness, the gratitude and doesn’t know to praise him the way that she used to before Dementia took over her life. Of course, when we pray with her, when we sing with her, when we read scripture with her – she comes back – at least for a short time.
I watch her while she sings and I see the praise on her face, I hear her voice and know that she is praising God with everything that she has inside! She sings with her eyes closed, she no longer can read for herself because of her blindness. She knows so many of the hymns – by heart and loves to sing! I can see – and feel - my Mother again when she worships instead of this disease that has taken her from me! One of the hardest things for her is that she can no longer go to worship services at the church building! Thank you, God, for Bob and Jeannie – who bring us communion each Sunday and sing and pray with us here at home. God is Mother’s stronghold and even though she doesn’t realize it anymore, I know that God is providing the comfort that she experiences now. I know that God has put into our lives Christy, Cathy and Connie – the special “angels” on earth who are her workers from Hospice and take care of her in a way that is so loving and so caring that their presence in itself is a comfort to Mother and to me! I know that with them, Mother is able to live at home again – not in a nursing home!
This has been a day! I don’t even know how to describe the kind of day it’s been, but I know that I’m tired tonight.
My prayer to my Heavenly Father is this – that Mother is able to sleep tonight and that God will continue to hold her in His hands and that she will feel His hands around her and be comforted!


Psalm 138
(1) I will give thee thanks with my whole heart:
Before the gods will I sing praises unto thee.
(2) I will worship toward thy holy temple,
And give thanks unto thy name for
thy loving kindness and for thy truth:
For thou hast magnified thy word above all thy name.
(3) In the day that I called thou answeredst me,
Thou didst encourage me with strength in my soul.

My Thursday Thirteen #2

Thirteen FriendsWho Bless My Life

1…. Karen, my friend for 10 years. A Godly woman, a great listener who provides comfort and reassurance that I am able to find strength through God when I need it most.

2....Bettye, my friend for 10 years. She, too, is a Godly woman who will pray with me and show me ways to "rethink" issues that I might not always see clearly.

3....Harolyn, my cousin and my friend. Even though we may go through periods of time when we don't see each other or talk, each time we do talk it's as though no time has passed. She has helped me get through many situations in my life just by "being there for me".

4....Virginia - A strong and faithful woman who shows such strength and love in caring for family. She is raising her grandchildren with such dedication that she truly is an inspiration to me.

5....Phyllis, my friend for 12 years. A very strong woman who even through times that were difficult for her comes through seemingly even stronger than she was before. So caring and considerate that I can't imagine my life had I not met her.

6....DeDe - another strong, faithful, dedicated Christian woman/wife/mother. She has been fighting disease for several years and has been an inspiration to me in the way she has fought - always able to smile and give of herself when she could so easily have given up.

7....Verna - my daughter's "second-mother", our babysitter from the time Elizabeth was four months old until she started school. She helped instill in Elizabeth good moral character, love and respect for others. When I was not able to be with Elizabeth, I never worried when she was with Verna - always knowing she was getting the "best".

8....Angelia - a woman I care deeply for but don't spend as much time as I would like to - visiting with her. She has taught me a lot - about strength, faith and sharing her faith, not only through her words, but through her daily walk.

9....Annie - who has inspired me by her words and by her dedication and faith in the recovery process for Isabell since her near-drowning accident. Annie's faith is evident by her words and her actions and I can "feel" the strong belief that she has that God will heal Isabell and glorifies Him in each step Isabell makes toward her complete healing.

10...My Mother - before she became lost to Dementia. She was so loving and giving, always putting others first. She was dedicated to my Dad for the 47 years they were married before his death. She took such wonderful care of him the last six years of his life when he was very ill. She stood at the head of his hospital bed and sang to him for 20 hours straight the last day of his life. I hope that I am at least "half" the wife and mother that she was.

11...Glenda - a good friend even when I didn't know that she was. She is another woman in my life who is faithful and dedicated in her daily walk with God. She is strong and "classy" and cares deeply for others.

12...Cary - who has helped me through so many difficulties, sharing her knowledge and wisdom with me to help me understand myself more. She is a guide, using God's word as her compass. I care very deeply for her.

13...Valerie - someone I've never met in person, but found her blog and have been touched by so many of her entries as well as comments she has left on mine.




Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Reconciliation

II Corinthians 5:

(17) Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! (18) All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: (19) that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. (20) We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. (21) God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

This has been a tough week for me and I ask for prayers for myself and for my family. My eyes have been opened to some “truths” which I have denied for some time now. I didn’t want to see what is really behind the actions of a person that I love very much and care deeply about. I have finally decided that I can’t be in denial and also be the wife and mother that I should be for my family.
It’s very difficult to believe that someone you love can be indifferent to those feelings. I tried to talk to this person about some lifestyle choices being made that definitely can cost the price of a soul. I wanted nothing more than for this person to examine the choices they are making, knowing right from wrong and having been taught, all their life, obedience and submission to God. I want, very much, for everyone I love and care about to know the peace, comfort and love of God and the blessings He pours upon His children!
The comments I made about the “choices” were taken as a “personal insult” and caused this person to separate themself from not only me, but the entire family! We have a huge hole where we used to hold them close in love! I am afraid this person would rather separate from us than see the love and concern I have for them.
I have done a lot of soul-searching since these realizations have hit and know that some of the relationships from the past that I have chosen to end because of struggles in those relationships need to have closure. I am determined to correct the emptiness left behind, either by apology or by explanation to those I may have hurt by separating myself from them. It’s hard to accept that I made choices that caused someone else to be hurt by my actions in the same way I am hurting now.
I am thankful that my God is a loving and forgiving God. I am thankful that these truths have been revealed to me so that I am able to recognize my own deficiencies even though this recognition means I will have to humble myself before, not only God, but individuals that I thought I left behind a long time ago.
I carried anger inside for a long time after separating myself from this difficult relationship and even though I was able to let go of the anger I never really made peace with people and know that I have to – even if it means opening a window in the walls I built up to protect myself from further hurt!

Each time anyone comes into contact with us,

they must become different and better people

because of having met us.

We must radiate God’s love.

We must know that we have been created for greater things,

not just to be a number in the world,

not just to go for diplomas and degrees,

this work and that work.

We have been created in order to love and to be loved.

Love does not measure. . . it just gives.

Mother Teresa

Another Day for Thanksgiving

Another week is ending and what a week! Today was good! I cooked the meal – turkey, ham, dressing and all the goodies! I had a couple of new recipes I really wanted to try, but most of my family doesn’t take well to new foods. Toni, Elizabeth, Candace, Mom and I are the ones who will try about anything. One of the recipes was for Brussels sprouts, which I love! Since Toni, Elizabeth and Candace were all unable to be here today, I decided to wait until another time to try the new recipe. Michael called this evening and said they would be here tomorrow, so I think I will try out the recipe then.

Only a few of us able to get together today, but I’ll take any of them I can get! Toni, Jeff and Blake were going to a friend’s today – Jeff’s best friend from high school had recently been involved in a car accident and after being in the hospital, then a rehab center, he is now mending at home.

Elizabeth and Michael were going to his parents for the day. I’m so thankful she has such great in-laws. She loves them and feels very comfortable with them and I think they feel the same way about her. Candace had to work today, but Nick and the boys came for lunch. Chance is a picky eater, so he didn’t enjoy the meal with us.

Charlie (my oldest brother) and Summer (his daughter) came over for a bit. It’s always good to see Charlie and I really enjoyed seeing Summer. It’s been a while since I last saw her. It was a good day.
Mom continues to sleep most of the time now. When she is awake, she’s confused. Elizabeth, Michael and Addy came out Tuesday and spent the night and most of yesterday here. Mom didn’t know Elizabeth part of the time she was here. Elizabeth handled it really well. Many times when Candace comes over, she gets caught up in Mom’s fantasy world. Mom asks her questions, which, of course, Candace has no way of knowing what the answer should be. She handles it well, also.
Jody’s grandmother died this week. He and Toni went to the funeral yesterday. I am not really close to Jody’s family and only met his grandmother once. I asked Jody if he wanted me to go with him, but knowing how hard it would be for me to get someone to sit with Mom, he said he would be fine to go alone.
I woke up this morning before everyone else and was having my coffee and watching TV. I found a Hallmark movie titled, “A Time To Remember” and started watching it. It was about a woman who comes back to visit her mother and finds her mother is in the early stages of Alzheimer’s. Of course I got caught up in the story because the mom in the story mirrored my Mom. The plot really was about mending fences and treasuring whatever time the mother and daughter had left – before the disease took over. It’s amazing how cleansing and refreshing a good cry can be. Those Hallmark movies really get to me!

Each and every day is Thanksgiving for me! I know how blessed I am and thank God for all the blessings! Every day brings something new and I look forward to discovering whatever comes next!

"Each moment is a place you've never been."

mark strand

The Things I Know!

The "Thursday Thirteen" was fun! I not only read other people’s blogs, but also put myself out there to meet people online and maybe start new friendships! I often tell people that starting this online journal has been therapeutic for me.
My life is good and I know how blessed I am, thanking God each day for the wonders that are mine to enjoy. Sometimes, I’m so comfortable that I don’t think about situations other people are living in – stress, turmoil, ill health and so many other things. My daily focus is on God and through His grace and mercy; I am strengthened – through prayer – and able to handle problems as they arise.

"This righteousness from God

comes through faith in Jesus Christ

to all who believe." Romans 3:22

I can imagine how lost people are when they make life choices contrary to the teachings of our Lord. Many years ago, I was one of those people making choices that would negatively impact my life – for the rest of my life!
I found others, through the "Thursday Thirteen" blogs I read, that have suffered some of the same trauma I experienced – bringing back many memories that I had “stuffed” away! There was one blog I found, http://adultsurvivors.blogspot.com, that really caused the memories to come flooding back! The blog is about childhood abuse, which was not my case, but the entry was so expressive and so accurate that it applies even if the abuse took place when the victim was an adult!
The author talks about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and the problems a victim carries with them throughout life. I know that my experiences have stayed with me and have caused me to build up walls that need to fall, but I don’t know how they will ever be brought down! I don’t give myself fully in relationships – whether the relationship is with a friend or even with some family members. When you’ve been hurt by a person who vows to care for you and protect you for a lifetime, do those scars ever go away? So far, I have not found the way. I have, in my heart, forgiven my abuser. Though I never told the abuser that I had forgiven him. After reading the blogs of other women who suffered abuse in the same manner, it seems that once they were able to express to the abuser that he was forgiven, they are able to move forward! Is that something I should do? Is that something I want to do? I honestly don’t know! I don’t believe he would receive the message the way it would be given and would also let him know where I am and how he could again find me. I pray that forgiving him, whether expressing it openly or not, is pleasing to God!
Something I do know – since having my Mom back home, it has made me much more aware of “time”. The time we have on this earth is so limited and I am more conscious of telling my family and my friends how I feel about them. I know that if I should leave this earth, I would want them all to know how much I love them. I’ve written some notes to my children – confessing my faults as a parent, asking their forgiveness for mistakes I made and also letting them know that everything I’ve done – for them or to them – was done in love. The kids probably think I’m losing my mind right along with Granny losing hers!
My birthday is in a couple of weeks - number 49 this year. The numbers have never bothered me and is not bothering me now except for the fact, that it becomes more real – I’m aging! I’m growing older! My children are growing older! Even my grandchildren will not be left behind and insist on growing older, also!
I guess what I’m really doing is working on myself a little more than I have in years past! The kids are grown, Mom sleeps most of the day now and I’m left to myself most of the time! I have a lot of “thinking time” which may or may not be a good thing!

Anyway,

these are the things I know:
1. I know that I am thankful for a great and merciful God who gives forgiveness to those of us who are unworthy of that forgiveness!

"In him we have redemption through his blood,

the forgiveness of sins,in accordance with the riches of God's grace" Ephesians 1:7

2. I know that I am thankful for my parents who taught us about the love of God and how we were made in his image – with free will to choose the paths we take in this life. How Our God must rejoice when one of us returns and comes back under the shelter of His grace – but of course, He knew that we would!

"Train a child in the way he should go,

and when he is old

he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

3. I know that I’m thankful for my husband, Jody. He loves me as I am – which is something I could not do for a very long time! He has taught me many things, and I never want to experience life without him!

Genesis 2

(22) Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. (23) The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman, ' for she was taken out of man." (24) For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

4. I know that I am thankful for my children. My daughters are all wives and mothers; my son is a strong, loving teenager, and knowing that we taught them to love the Lord and to live a good life based on the teachings of God, I pray they will make good choices for their lives.

“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” Ephesians 5:1,2

”My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.” 1 John 2:1

5. I know that I am thankful to have my Mom living with us for the remainder of her life. She was so unhappy in the nursing home, after she became so confused! I am thankful that God provided Jody and me with the wisdom to know how we could manage our finances without me working an outside job.

“But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.” 1 Timothy 5:4

6. I know that I am thankful to have been taught to love God and to keep his commandments. I know that I am thankful that Jesus Christ came and lived on this earth in the flesh and then died on the cross so that we may all experience his forgiveness through our repentance! I know that I am thankful to have been taught the power of the Holy Spirit!

My prayer to my Heavenly Father is a prayer of Thanksgiving for the many blessings he has bestowed upon me. Thanksgiving for my family and the closeness we share! Thanksgiving that Mother, even though she is more confused, is not as anxious as time goes by. Thankfulness for the freedoms we have in this country and prayers for the leaders of our country to make decisions pleasing to Him! I pray for humility – to live a life pleasing to God – a life of love and forgiveness. I pray for others, who may be suffering or may not know the Lord – that they will be taught and come to know of the peace that comes only through Him!

Philippians 2:

(1)” If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion,

(2) then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.

(3) Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

(4) Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

(5) Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:

(6) Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,

(7) but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.

(8) And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross!

(9) Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name,

(10) that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

(11) and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father.”