9 questions posted every Saturday. Sometimes the post will have a theme, and at other times the questions will be totally unrelated. Those weeks we do "random questions," so-to-speak. We encourage you to visit other participants posts and leave a comment. Because we don't have any rules, it is your choice. We hate rules. We love memes, however, and here is today's meme!
1. When was the last time you lost your temper with someone? I can't remember losing my temper - and verbalizing it - in a very long time! I still get angry, but keep it to myself most of the time. I actually was angry just this past week, but said nothing to the person!
2. What was it about? It's been an ongoing problem with a particular group of people for about 20 years now. I am married - but separated - and when I married I also became stepmother to two little girls who lived with us full time. I grew to absolutely love the girls and considered them mine - just as my own two biological children were mine. This group of people decided, I guess, that I was not a good mom to these girls and it felt like they fought my husband and I continuously about the way we were raising the girls. When my husband and I talked about the frustration and tried to understand why they were acting the way they did about the girls, he just kept saying that talking to them wouldn't matter - it wouldn't change anything. He said he had felt "left out" of the family for a very long time. Still today, they treat my husband as a "non-family member and it still hurts me - and angers me - to see it.
3. Were you totally right or totally wrong? As a parent you raise your children in the best way you know how, we're not perfect - there's no instruction book. I think parents should have the final say - about everything involving their own children, unless of course there's abuse or neglect involved. So I felt like my husband and I were right - they were, after all, our children!
4. If wrong, how long until you realized it? If right, how long until the other person realized it? The group of people act like they never do any wrong and so, of course, never realized or never acknowledged that fact.
5. Did you go a length of time without speaking? I have not spoken to them in years and really see no need to do so. I was so angry for a long time that I refused to see them at all. I'm no longer angry, but also feel that you don't repeatedly put yourself in situations that are hopeless or that only cause pain.
6. Who made the first move? No move by either
7. Do you feel the situation is resolved now? It's resolved with me only because I no longer have to deal with them. It actually contributed to the breakup of my marriage. It's very difficult to live in circumstances that cause you to feel unaccepted, unworthy!
8. Do you ever give in, knowing you weren’t wrong, to keep the peace? I do - much more than I did when I was younger. You learn to pick your battles and most of them are not worth the time!
9. Was there permanent damage even though you’ve made up? There is permanent damage and, as I said, for me the anger is gone - but the hurt remains. I think if we had been able to talk - constructively - the results may have been different.
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In His Love and Blessings
annb
I *totally* agree with you about picking your battles. Hope you have a great Saturday, and don't forget to stop by my blog--I'm running a makeup giveaway!
ReplyDeletehttp://drivennurseexec.blogspot.com/2008/09/makeup-giveaway.html